Sunday News #21
Feeling
I came out as queer to my friends and family on Wednesday. Before then only a small group of people knew. Even though I’ve been planning to come out during Pride Month for a while now, I’ve been scared about it because most of my family and friends are conservative and I wasn’t sure how they’d react. So far, the response has been amazing and I’ve felt loved and accepted.
Blogging
This week on the blog:
Reading
I did make a little bit of headway with WHERE THE CRAWDADS SING by Delia Owens this week, but I didn’t finish it like I wanted to because I’ve been really busy with school. Hopefully, I can spend more time reading this week.
Listening
In honor of my coming out, I’m sharing Lady Gaga’s “Born This Way.” She’s one of my favorite musicians and I love this song.
Watching
Corey and I are still watching and loving OBI-WAN KENOBI and STAR TREK: STRANGE NEW WORLDS. We also watched the first episode of the new season of THE ORVILLE. It was really powerful and we’re both so glad to have it back on the air.
I also saw both DOWNTON ABBEY: THE NEW ERA and TOP GUN: MAVERICK in the theater with some friends. I enjoyed both movie, but Top Gun was basically A New Hope with F/A-18E/F Super Hornets and SU-57s instead of X-Wings and TIE Fighters. At one point, one of the characters even says, “Stay on target.”
Loving
I love Instagram ads. I’m definitely their target audience. Thanks to an ad, I found the solution to a problem I’ve been thinking about for the last year.
As some of my readers know, I deal with mental illness and I’ve tried to hurt myself because of it. I’ve been wanting to get a semicolon tattoo on my right hand, specifically between the first and second knuckle of my middle finger, as a reminder that “my story isn’t other yet.” (This has to do with the semicolon project.) I know nothing about tattoos, and according to my research, there’s a lot of debate about getting them on your hands. In fact, some tattoo artists won’t even do them there because they disappear after awhile.
Anyway, last week, I saw this ad for Zox. They make affirmation bracelets. They have a bunch of designs and one of them is purplish-pink () with semicolons and the word “continue” written on it. For $12, I bought one, it was delivered yesterday, and I love it.
Wanting
I wanted to share my latest computer programming project. We’re learning Python and we learned how to use turtle graphics this past week. Turtle graphics is a pre-installed module that allows programmers to create pictures and shapes by using different commands. My assignment was to create a landscape or picture with at least three “atomic” shapes, meaning something that can be broken down into simple shapes, like a square, rectangle, etc. Here’s what I programmed:
It took me about seven hours to do. I love it, though, and I feel really accomplished.
Needing
I need more sleep. I haven’t been sleeping very well. I’ve been going to bed around my usual time, which is midnight. I’m just not falling asleep until 3 or 4am and I’m getting up four or five hours later.
How was your week? Anything exciting happen?
I am so glad and relieved that the responses you got for your coming out have been all positive. Yay! more power to you! I really like the bracelet too.
Thank you, Gayathri! 😀
My daughter came out to her immediate family and close friends about 18 months ago. There are still some relatives she doesn’t want to know, less because they are judgemental and more because they are overly nosy at the best of times! We went on our first pride march last year and had such a great time we’re hoping to do some more this year.
I love your tattoo compromise, I kind of want one but worry I’ll regret it or not like it so keep changing my mind. And go you with the computer programming – I had to learn Fortran 77 when I was at University an eon ago – it didn’t go well and I’ve avoided anything to do with computer languages ever since.
I totally get it why your daughter doesn’t want to come out to certain people! 🙂 I’m glad you’ve had such a great time with your daughter doing the pride march. I’m not sure what that means for me yet. The beauty is that I can do as much or as little as I want. 🙂
I am glad your family and friends have been supportive, it was very brave of you to tell them. It opens up questions, and I am curious (and obviously you don’t have to answer), but you are married, so I am not sure how that works? Do you like guys and girls? Again, you don’t have to answer. I know several of my youth are saying they are gay, one of them is a girl who struggles with which identity she is (if that makes sense). My son’s best friend is gay, he told me several years ago, but he hasn’t told my son because he isn’t sure how he will react. I think it would be good if he told my son so he could see that his best friend is still the same person he always has been and hopefully it would broaden my son’s horizons so that he doesn’t necessarily have to agree with their choice, but they can still be friends. Not sure if this is making sense. Anyway, sorry for the rabbit trail, I hope you continue to get positive responses from your friends and family and have a wonderful week.
I don’t mind answering. I actually identify as a heteroromantic gay cisgender female. This means that I was assigned female at birth and I identify as female, I have romantic attachment to those who identify as male, and I’m sexually attracted to those who identify as female. It’s a little complicated so I’ve chosen to simply use queer to describe me.
My husband’s a cisgender heterosexual male and we’ve been married for 24 years. Even though our sexualities aren’t the same, we’ve made our relationship work. We’re staying married.
If I’m not going to be in a gay relationship, why am I coming out? I’m coming out because I don’t want to hide anymore. I want to be myself. I want to embrace every part of me, which means no longer feeling shame because of my upbringing.
Thank you for answering my questions (and educating me). It does sound complicated which is why when I asked I said one of my youth struggles with identifying who she is she has used several of the terms you used, and others as well.
No problem. 🙂 And, yes, I understand what your youth is dealing with. I’ve known I wasn’t heterosexual for years. I just didn’t know what I was. I thought I was asexual for a while because I’m not sexually attracted to my husband, I grew up in a sexually oppressive culture, and some of my medications mess with my libido.
My religion preaches tolerance and love to all, but acting on same-sex attraction and even acting on any sexual feelings, gay or straight, outside of marriage is considered a sin. Because of this, I’ve felt a lot of shame because I knew I wasn’t heterosexual and I couldn’t really explore it or talk about it (if that makes sense). I had to work through my shame first before I could figure out how I identified. I hope your youth feels like she has a safe place to explore her identity. {{{hugs to her}}}
I am so happy that your news was well received by family and friends. We all need a supportive environment. I love your new bracelet too! Have a great week ahead.
Thank you, Jodie! 😀
I love the bracelet and admire your courage in coming out. I’m extremely relieved that the response was positive! You have so much to be proud of in how you’re pushing forward to lead the life that you want and need.
Thanks, Margaret! 😀
Its wonderful that your family has been supportive! I’m so happy for you!
Thank you so much! 🙂 I’m very lucky, I know. I think the ones who aren’t okay with it, per se, are just ignoring that I said anything. Right now, that will have to do. In the future, I may push them to deal with it more. One step at a time.
I’ve been watching the same tv shows as you. I loved the episodes of Obi Wan Kenobi and The Orville. I haven’t made it to the theater yet but I want to see the new Downton Abbey and Top Gun Mav.
I hope you enjoy Downton Abbey and Top Gun. 🙂 You’ll have to let me know what you think.
Congratulations to you! I’m glad you’re getting support from family and friends. 🙂
I need to start Obiwan and Star Trek actually. I just finished Stranger Things so now I’m ready to binge some thing new. 🙂
“Stay on target”? Seriously??? That cracks me up!
Thanks, Greg! 😀 I hope you enjoy Obi-Wan and Star Trek as much as I have. And, “Stay on target,” right?! I literally rolled my eyes. Ha!
I’m so glad you felt supported by family and friends. Being different isn’t easy but it’s fulfilling to be yourself.
Anne – Books of My Heart This is my Sunday Post
Thanks, Anne! 🙂 I’m glad it’s gone as well as it has. I know that it may change and I probably will get some people who treat me differently. I’ll deal with it when it happens, I guess.
Congratulations on coming out!! I always tried to remind my children when they were growing up that we would accept them always. I just wish our country was a lot further along at accepting everyone. We sure have come a long way… but we have a long way to go too.
I do love your bracelet too.
Thanks, Wendy! 😀
I applaud your bravery. I’m so glad to hear that everyone has been supportive.
I can’t speak on the tattoo part (since I don’t have any), but what about getting it on your wrist instead? I see a lot of people with wrist tattoos? Or, if you are dead set on the finger, just go in knowing you will have to have touch ups.
I’ve thought about betting one on my wrist and I’ve thought about still getting one on my finger knowing I’d need to get touchups. I just don’t know enough about it to know what it all entails. Right now, I don’t have the money for a tattoo so when I do, I’ll have to look into it more seriously and find out what I can/can’t do and what I want to do.
I’m so glad that you have found support and acceptance from those close to you. I can’t imagine how stressful opening up had to have been. I’m sorry to hear you’ve haven’t been sleeping well. Maybe with pressure off of you it will get better? I’ve had some sleep issues as well though not sure what’s causing them. I hope you have a wonderful week!
Thanks, Katherine! 🙂 I hope that’s why I was having a hard time sleeping. It would be nice to get more sleep.
Congratulations and happy that you are accepted and loved by all. Have a great summer with your computer projects and reading.
Thanks, Harvee! 😀
I’m so happy you have a supportive family. That’s wonderful!
I’m all caught up with Strange New Worlds and love it. I’m so sad because I don’t get The Orville anymore. Since they changed to Hulu and I don’t get that, but I used to love the show.
Hope you have a great week!
Thanks, Yvonne! 🙂 I’m sorry that you don’t have Hulu so you can’t watch The Orville. I know it’s hard to justify one more streaming service, especially when they all cost money and it adds up.
I’m happy that you have felt love and acceptance from family and friends. That is wonderful.
I love your idea of wearing a band over a tattoo. So many positive things about a band over a tattoo: (1) You can easily change your band vs. Not so easy to change with a tattoo, (2) Bands are not painful to put on vs. Needles poking into your skin and ink being inserted with a tattoo, and (3) Bands aren’t too pricey vs. tattoos that cost what I paid for my first car.
Thank you, Deb! 😀 And, yes, I agree with your assessment on the band over a tattoo. I especially like that I can get multiple different styles and change them as my tastes change.