Sunday News #10

Sunday Post and Sunday Salon are blog news memes hosted at Caffeinated Reviewer and Reader Buzz, respectively. It’s a chance to share news, recap the past week on your blog, and showcase books and other things.
Feeling

I’m feeling hopeful. Friday was the worst day I had with this stomach bug, but then I felt almost normal yesterday. I’m hoping I’m over the worst of it now and I can get on with my life and start enjoying life again. I’m still going to take it easy and only eat soup so I don’t cause more upset to my digestive tract.

Blogging

This week on the blog:

Reading

I finished reading NINE PERFECT STRANGERS by Liane Moriarty yesterday. I’ll be posting my review tomorrow. I’ll be starting FANGIRL by Rainbow Rowell today. Hopefully, I can read it quickly because I also want to finish THE SILVER CHAIR by CS Lewis, the next installment of the Narniad for the Narniathon21, this week.

Listening

I’ve been listening to some of my favorite K-pop songs. I’m a very casual K-pop listener. My friend Suey (It’s All About Books) introduced me to K-pop and K-dramas like seven or eight years ago. I haven’t watched a K-drama since 2016, though. I like the dramas; I’d just rather spend my time watching shows with Corey and he’s not interested in K-dramas at all.

Anyway, the K-pop songs I listen to are the original songs I put on my list back in 2015-2016. I’ve been told by other K-poppers that it’s the old stuff. Even if my playlist is old, I still like it a lot. Suey helps me add new music every now and then through her blog and YouTube channel. If you’re really into K-pop or K-dramas, you should check out her blog.

Watching

I watched the season 4 finale of Star Trek: Discovery with Corey this week. It was really good. View Spoiler »

Corey and I are now up to season 5 of How I Met Your Mother. I found out that Colbie Smulders reprised her role as Robin in the first season finale of How I Met Your Father. I wasn’t going to watch it, but I think I am now. I’ll at least give it a chance and see if I like it.

Loving

I really love my doctor. He fit me in this week so we could talk about my sickness. He ran tests. I don’t have C. difficile or H. pylori. I’m glad that I don’t have either of those and I’m frustrated we don’t know why I’ve been sick for the last three weeks. I have another appointment with my doctor on Tuesday (he fit me in for this one too) to discuss what to do going forward. Hopefully, I’ll be able to give him the good news that I’m still feeling better like I am today.

Wanting

I want Debbie and Brittany to know I appreciate their thoughtful cards. They both sent me a “thinking of you” card this week. Each note contained a couple of cute stickers and a bookmark. They both made my day.

Needing

I need to talk to my academic advisor about how this semester has been kind of off the rails. I need to find out what my options are. I think I’ll be able to be okay in one or two of my classes. And, I know I’m going to fail my computer programming class because I’m just so far behind due to being so sick. I’ll probably just have to take the class again at a later time unless I’m allowed do an Incomplete.

How was your week? Anything exciting happen?

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Sunday News #9

Sunday Post and Sunday Salon are blog news memes hosted at Caffeinated Reviewer and Reader Buzz, respectively. It’s a chance to share news, recap the past week on your blog, and showcase books and other things.
Feeling

I’m feeling accomplished. This week was spring break for my university and I used it to get caught up in most of my classes. I’m still not caught up in one class because I had a second bout of the stomach flu this week. Overall, though, I feel great about what I did accomplish and I hope I can catch up in the last class over the next few weeks.

I’m also feeling happy and nostalgic because tomorrow is my 24th wedding anniversary. Sometimes I can’t believe Corey and I’ve been married as long as we have. It’s been hard and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

Blogging

This week on the blog:

Reading

I finished reading and posted a review of THE SOUND OF STARS by Alechia Dow this week. I want to start reading NINE PERFECT STRANGERS by Liane Moriarty or FANGIRL by Rainbow Rowell today. It just depends on if I’m feeling well enough. I’ve stated before that when I’m sick, especially with a stomach bug or major headache, I can’t read. My brain doesn’t let me.

Listening

This week I’ve been listening to Star Wars prequel music because the teaser trailer for the new Obi-Wan Kenobi Disney+ show dropped. I John Williams SOOOOO much. I especially love the Star Wars score and the prequel scores are absolutely beautiful. “Battle of the Heroes” from Revenge of the Sith is one of my favorites from the prequels.

Watching

I watched the new Obi-Wan Kenobi Disney+ teaser trailer and it looks f*cking amazing!!! I’m so excited! I love Ewan McGregor. And, I don’t care what people say; I also love Hayden Christensen as Anakin. Here’s the teaser trailer if you haven’t seen it yet:

Corey and I also watched The Adam Project with Ryan Reynolds on Netflix last night. We both really enjoyed it. It was funny, full of action, and very heart-warming. The kid they got to play young Ryan Reynolds was perfect! He acted just like Ryan Reynolds did. If I didn’t know he was his own person, I would’ve thought he was Ryan Reynolds’ younger self. Hmmm, do you think I can say Ryan Reynolds again? Ryan Reynolds…

Loving

I’m really loving bingeing How I Met Your Mother with Corey. It’s been a lot of fun. I’m really enjoying watching the whole show since I’ve only seen some of the pivotal episodes. And, I love spending the time with Corey.

Wanting

I want to get over this flu that I’ve now had twice in the last two weeks. My intestines are still cramping up horribly and I can’t eat much more than rice.

Needing

I need to see my doctor because of how sick I’ve been. My husband and I are worried I might have a mild case of C. difficile. I made an appointment, but his soonest opening isn’t until April 18. I also sent him a message through my patient portal, explaining what’s going on. Maybe, he’ll try to squeeze me in next week. Either that or hopefully someone will cancel so I can get in sooner. *fingers crossed*

How was your week? Anything exciting happen?

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Sunday News #8

Sunday Post and Sunday Salon are blog news memes hosted at Caffeinated Reviewer and Reader Buzz, respectively. It’s a chance to share news, recap the past week on your blog, and showcase books and other things.
Feeling

I’m feeling a lot better emotionally than I have in a long time (other than being worried and sad about what’s happening in Ukraine). It’s really interesting because last weekend I was in a pretty low place from losing my friend. Because of a few comments from my readers and the tools I’ve learned in therapy, I started to look at what happened differently.

Even though how my friend handled the situation is what upset me the most, I realized her feelings mattered just as much as mine did. I also realized even though I’m still sad, this is for the best and I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off of me because I’m no longer wondering what’s going on.

Blogging

This week on the blog:

Reading

I finished reading THE VOYAGE OF THE DAWN TREADER by CS Lewis on Monday. I started reading THE SOUND OF STARS by Alechia Dow again. I’ve been sick with the stomach flu or really bad food poisoning so I haven’t made much progress. (I can’t read when I’m sick. My brain doesn’t let me.) Now that I’m starting to feel better, I’m hoping I can finish THE SOUND OF STARS sometime this week.

Listening

This week because I have been sick, I haven’t been listening to anything really. So, here’s one of my favorites songs, “Cristofori’s Dream” by David Lanz. I’d love to learn how to play this on the piano.

Watching

Corey and I watched the first episode of the new season of Star Trek: Picard! Holy sh*t! It was amazing!!! I’ve never been this excited for a new season of Star Trek before!!!

Loving

I loved the season finale of The Amazing Race. It couldn’t have ended any better than it did, IMHO.

Wanting

I want my friend and her family in Ukraine and all her country people to be safe and not to have to worry about their freedom being taken away by Putin’s need for power and control. I hope the Ukrainian military and people can continue to defend themselves and that the rest of the world steps up and helps them. Also, f*ck you, Putin. #IStandWithUkraine

Needing

I need my body to recover a little faster from this flu or food poisoning that I’ve had this week. I’m no longer in the bathroom every five minutes, but I can still only eat rice and drink water. If I eat anything else, my intestines cramp up horribly. I just feel like my digestive system is sore and needs a break.

How was your week? Anything exciting happen?

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Sunday News #7

Sunday Post and Sunday Salon are blog news memes hosted at Caffeinated Reviewer and Reader Buzz, respectively. It’s a chance to share news, recap the past week on your blog, and showcase books and other things.
Feeling

I’m feeling crushed and a little bit numb. My friendship of 10 years with my BFF ended this week. She basically told me she can’t handle my Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) because the unpredictability of my moods is too much for her. She termed my mood swings as tantrums.

I understand being around someone with a mental illness like mine is hard. I also understand the last year has been difficult because of my suicide attempt last March. I know what I did didn’t just affect me; it affected everyone around me.

Last week, I said I was diagnosed with Quiet BPD, which means that I act in rather than out. In the past, most people, except maybe my husband, didn’t even know I was struggling. My moods have been more unpredictable because I’m in a very intense therapy program (I talked about it last week) and a lot of my struggles, pains, issues are rising to the surface what feels like almost constantly. This makes it really hard for me to regulate my emotions and it’s like the “quiet” part of my diagnosis is gone.

It’s all new terrain for me. At some point, I’ll be able to regulate my emotions better. That’s what my therapy’s doing for me–giving me the skills so I can navigate difficult situations. I’m learning, changing, and growing. And, with growing, there are growing pains. I wish my ex-friend could see that.

Blogging

I only started to blog again two months ago. I love blogging. I’ve actually had a website since 1996 in some way, shape, or form. The only reason I stopped blogging was because of severe depression. It just had too much of a hold on me and I didn’t have the tools to fight the anhedonia that accompanied the depression. It’s only because of my current therapist and Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) that I’m blogging again.

Why am I mentioning this? The devastation of losing my friend the way I did this week nearly caused me to close up shop again, especially since she’s part of the blogging community and I’ll to continue to see her around the interwebs. … I decided, though, that no matter how much this hurts, she doesn’t get to win, in that way anyway. I’m going to keep blogging, reading, and moving forward in my therapy. Not for her, for me.

This week on the blog:

Reading

I started reading THE SOUND OF STARS by Alechia Dow. To be honest, though, I’ve been preoccupied with other things as you can imagine. I’m going to put THE SOUND OF STARS on hold for a couple of days so I can quickly read THE VOYAGE OF THE DAWN TREADER by CS Lewis for the latest installment for the Narniathon21 that I’m participating in.

Listening

This week, I’ve been listening to The Tabernacle Choir at Temple Square. They used to be known as the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. Whenever I’m feeling really down or I’m going through a really tough time, I listen to The Tabernacle Choir sing because it’s comforting and helps remind me I’m not alone.

I have several favorite songs, especially if they’re performing in person or on TV. My favorite, this week, has been “Consider the Lilies” because it was my mom’s favorite and it reminds me of her. I miss her lot. “Consider the Lilies” comes from the following scripture:

“And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin.”

Matthew 6:28 KJV
Watching

I’ve been watching the new season of The Amazing Race. I really like the contestants. Kim and Penn Holderness are my favorite. I’m not a Holderness family fanatic or anything. I’ve watched some of their YouTube videos, but I don’t subscribe to them. I just really like Kim and Penn as a team. They’re very considerate to each other. I’ve never once heard them put each other down like other couples have and do on the show. The last time I watched The Amazing Race was season 9. It’s fun to watch it again after all this time. This season has been interesting because it was interrupted for more than 18 months by the pandemic.

Loving

I discovered Among Us, the video game, and I love it! It’s so much fun to play. I love that I can play it on my Nintendo Switch and Corey can join with his computer or iPhone. If you like video games, I highly recommend it. It takes a little bit to get used to the rules and game play, but once you understand what’s going on, you won’t want to put it down.

Wanting

I want a do-over. This semester is turning out to be a disaster. I’m having a hard time staying focused, caught up, and motivated because all my classes are online due to omicron and I do better when I’m actually in the classroom. Also, some of my mental health struggles during the last three weeks have made it a little harder than normal to focus on school.

Needing

I need Russia to leave Ukraine alone. And, honestly, it’s not really Russia, it’s Vladimir Putin. The Russians are subject to his whims and, unfortunately, the Ukrainians have to pay for it. I hope this ordeal doesn’t last long and I wish I could help other than just hurling insults at Putin.

How was your week? Anything exciting happen?

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Sunday News #6

Sunday Post and Sunday Salon are blog news memes hosted at Caffeinated Reviewer and Reader Buzz, respectively. It’s a chance to share news, recap the past week on your blog, and showcase books and other things.
Feeling

I’m feeling exhausted both physically and mentally. I’m also feeling grateful. (I’m not sure about talking about this. I have before, but not as a book blogger. I’m a little nervous I won’t be accepted the same way I was after sharing this.)

I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) about a year and a half ago. This means my emotions are more extreme than the general population. I can go from feeling really happy to suddenly feeling the lowest I’ve ever felt all within a matter of minutes. People with BPD are often misdiagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. However, the ups and downs with Bipolar Disorder last longer, usually weeks at a time, whereas the ups and downs with BPD only last for hours, maybe days.

Trigger warning. Only continue reading if you’re in a good space. It’s been a really difficult week. I wanted to hurt myself earlier in the week because of a misperception on my part that made me spiral into a bad place. Luckily, I was able to use my skills that I’ve been learning in DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) and stop myself before I did anything. It’s the first time I’ve come to really hurting myself since last March when I overdosed on Lithium and ended up in the hospital for a week.

Mental illnesses are hard. They’re invisible. Others don’t know you’re suffering most of the time and with my type of BPD, Quiet BPD where I act in rather than out, it’s even harder for others to recognize when I’m having a rough go. What I’ve learned in DBT is that it’s not up to others to make me feel better. It’s up to me. It’s been a long, hard process. Sometimes, I want to give up. I remember where I was almost a year ago and that I never want to go through that again. DBT has given me the skills to help me succeed. Without learning how to regulate my emotions when I’m in crisis, I wouldn’t have been able to stop myself and I may not have survived this week. I thank God for my therapist and DBT!

Blogging

This week on the blog:

Reading

I finished reading ROCK PAPER SCISSORS by Alice Feeney yesterday and I’ll be posting my review tomorrow. I’m starting THE SOUND OF STARS by Alechia Dow today. It’s one of my picks for Black History Month. I don’t think I’ll get to my second pick, which is a companion novel to THE SOUND OF STARS called THE KINDRED.

I’ve managed to read four of the books that all came available at the same time from the library. I still have two more to read, both Alechia Dow books, and as I said above, I’ll probably only finish the one by Thursday. Five out of six books is awesome! Especially for me, one of the slowest readers in existence! Okay, not really, but I am slow.

Listening

Last week, I said I’d share my favorite song by The Piano Guys since I shared their version of “Für Elise.” Here’s my favorite song. I like to listen to it when I’m feeling down, which is perfect for this week. What do you think?

Watching

I watched the new season of Disenchantment with Corey on Netflix. It’s from the makers of Futurama and The Simpsons. As you know from last week, I’m a huge fan of Futurama. Disenchantment has been Corey’s and my way of dealing with no Futurama. Plus, it’s a really good show!

Loving

I love this picture of my cat Izzy that Corey sent me while I was at group (for DBT) on Thursday. It makes me smile and laugh. She’s such a crazy kitty. I love her so much.

Wanting

I want more! Bear with me, lol. My friends and I had a chance to go to our local library to attend a book launch for LEMON DROP FALLS by Heather Clark. She was in conversation with author Jennifer A. Nielsen. It was the first author event we’ve been to in over two years because of the pandemic. Now, that we’ve gone to one event, I want to keep going. I miss them and I miss getting out.

Needing

I need to spend more time with my friends. I’m an extrovert and I need people. I think my recent decline in mood has been due to isolating more because of omicron. Even though this week was hard and I almost hurt myself, I also felt happier than I have in a really long time. I felt the happiest when I was out with my friends.

How was your week? Anything exciting happen?

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