I want to share my experience with Crisis Text Line. I contacted them late Friday night because I felt like harming myself. I didn’t want to break the promise I made to myself, though, so I turned to my Suicide Safety Plan instead and chose to contact one of the national hotlines.
What promise you ask? I promised my therapist and Corey I wouldn’t attempt to kill myself anymore after receiving my Borderline Personality Disorder diagnosis. Why did I promise them after being diagnosed with BPD? Dialectical Behavior Therapy is very helpful for those with BPD. One technique is a 24-hour no contact rule with the therapist when a patient tries to harm themselves. You might think this rule is counterintuitive but it’s meant to reinforce the patient not harming themselves. Therapists want patients to contact them for skills before they harm themselves not after so the patients learn to not act on their urges.
My therapist has this 24-hour no contact rule. It scared me that I wouldn’t be able to speak with him if I needed him. I made a promise to myself that I would do everything in my power to not cause the 24-hour no contact rule to go into effect. (See, it works.)
Because of an event that caused me to spiral emotionally, I started to rethink my promise on Friday. I didn’t want to kill myself yet, but I needed someone to talk to. Because it was so late, I didn’t want to call any of my friends or my therapist. I also didn’t want to call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline. I decided to text the Crisis Text Line (741741) instead.
It was really easy and I spoke to a super nice person who was very knowledgeable about mental health. I didn’t feel like she was placating me or trying to get rid of me. I felt like she genuinely cared and wanted to help me. She gave me several links to mental health resources before we ended our conversation and then invited me to text back if I needed to.
I hope as I continue to go through therapy that the need to reach out to organizations like Crisis Text Line will diminish. However, I’m glad I had an awesome experience with Crisis Text Line so if I ever do need to reach out again, I know I can trust them to help get me in a good place.
Conversation with Crisis Text Line
Just because it may be helpful for someone else feeling suicidal, here’s my experience with Crisis Text Line. The image order is from left to right and then down to the second row. You can also click an image to make it bigger.